This has year cycle was quite challenging. I dealt with friendship loss, stress, anxiety, and inadequacy. I would go on social media and talk to my friends as they have gained bigger and better jobs, stronger relationships, weight loss, and other life-changing realizations. For me, I felt as though I was in trailing my way through a swamp with no exit or area of purpose.
I would face myself in the mirror and wonder why I am not making the changes I know I have wanted. Why am I so complacent?
I was and still am scared. I am getting married, I moved to a new state, and now I have left my last area of reliability, my job.
I wrote a few months back about the sheer amount of stress I endured and actually cried over my treatment at work. That was the first and last time that happened in that role. I knew I was broken and would not see a light at the end of the tunnel while still in the same position. However, when Sterling decided to take a leap of faith himself by moving to Nashville I became worried about being the stable partner. Always having to catch him in case he fell.
Days began to roll into each other as I worked and received nothing in return. I interviewed for Amazon and although I did not get the role, they told me I was worth way more than what I was making. AMAZON told me that. So I knew that I could demand it elsewhere.
But, I feel back to stress and complacency since so much planning and money was needed for the wedding I would just hold off again until after the wedding to find a new role.
Then a colleague reach out and provided me with an opportunity. I wasn't looking but I finally got an offer I deserved and took it without a thought. This is honestly one of the most difficult things I have ever done. I am still scared out of my mind but, I know I prayed for this moment and God provided me this opportunity because he felt I was ready just as he did in college.
So six days into the 27th chapter of my life, I am starting a new role in anticipation of greatness. Wish me luck!